Editor’s Note: This is a guest post by Julia Ubbenga.
After honing my decluttering skills over the past few years, I’ve developed a theory.
Goes like this.
Our ability to declutter grows in direct proportion to our ability to make decisions.
Think about it.
The minute we dive into decluttering, we open wide the decision making floodgates. The decisions often begin with our possessions:
Do I still love and need this zucchini spiralizer?
Is this shirt that still has tags on it worth selling or should I just donate it?
What the heck do I do with this 1990’s Beanie Baby collection?
Do I really need 23 towels?
A smoothly made decision means a smoother—and often quicker—decluttering process. The average adult makes about 35,000 decisions a day, and when in decluttering mode—holding each item, determining its future—we make even more. Shortening the length of your debate-decide-act cycle shortens the amount of time clutter stays around your home.
In my experience, the decluttering decisions soon go beyond surface-level. After answering questions about our stuff, we begin asking deeper questions about our life.
Do I want to believe every thought pattern I have?
Do I keep these commitments even though they drain me?
Our decision making abilities can be built up like a muscle, and decisiveness regarding what matters most in life is a skill worth developing.
Our ability to routinely make intentional decisions based on our values is the driving force behind building a meaningful life with less stuff and less stress.
So how can you make meaningful decisions with greater consistency and become more decisive while decluttering?
Here are four tips that will help:
1. Identify your fears
When faced with a decision, ask yourself “What am I afraid of.” Then ask yourself, “What would I do if I wasn’t afraid?” More often than not, indecision is a byproduct of fear (quite often the fear of loss).
Are you hesitant to donate your four year old’s excess toys because you think she’ll feel deprived? Identify the fear and its level of truth. Children’s play becomes deeper and more creative with fewer toys. Let those toys go.
Are you delaying decluttering your home (or an area of it) because you’re afraid you’ll regret letting something go? The mental and physical effects of living in a cluttered space outweigh the perceived pain of missing a possession. You don’t want to live life weighed down. Start small today.
2. Practice pausing
In her book The Minimalist Way Erica Layne recommends taking a mindful pause before making a decision to ensure your choice is meaningful. Decisions made in a reactionary state are less likely to be in line with our core values.
Tell yourself you can make a meaningful decision, pause, take a deep breath, and then decide. You may even put your hand on your heart to remind yourself to check in with what feels right to you—not what others might think is the best option. Pausing to tune into your intuition will consistently lead to intentional decisions.
I use this tip most when decluttering sentimental items. I like The Minimalists’ “spontaneous combustion question,” which is based on tapping into your feelings (read more here).
3. Revisit your values
Layne says that identifying the option most in line with your values is especially helpful when a decision isn’t clear cut. When faced with several good options, revisiting your unique values will help facilitate your decision.
For example, let’s go back to decluttering kids’ toys. Say you’re deciding which toys to keep for your three year old, and have a “maybe” pile filled with perfectly good play things. You might be tempted to keep them because they’re nice toys, you (or someone else) spent money on them, and there is a chance your child might play with them some day (even though he/she doesn’t currently).
If one of your top core values is inner peace, you can focus on that value and decide to let the toys go (fewer toys means less stress and more peace for you and your family). If one of your top core values is connection with family, realizing that less stuff leads to more space for connection can help you let the excess toys go.
4. Change your surroundings
Layne writes, “Changing your surroundings is one of the quickest ways to get a fresh perspective and prepare yourself to make a decision that reflects your values.” When you give yourself physical space from a situation, you often see it with increased clarity.
Even a subtle change of scenery can assist in decision making. Step outside and take deep breaths of fresh air to feel grounded. Take a quick walk around your block or go on a drive through a new area of town. Novelty and a break in routine will recharge your mind, help fight decision fatigue, and provide the perspective needed to make an intentional decision.
I find this especially helpful during longer decluttering sessions. Taking a five minute break that incorporates nature every 30 to 40 minutes ensures my decisions will continue to be in line with my values.
If your goal is to live more simply and intentionally with less stuff and more space to focus on what matters, then it’s worth refining your decision making skills.
Layne said, “It’s comforting and confidence-building to know that you’re letting go of something appealing for something better—something that’s a tight fit with your most deeply held values.”
When we choose to live without excess possessions, unproductive thought patterns, and unfulfilling commitments, we let go of the trivial to focus on the essential. And life soon has more meaning.
The next time you’re facing indecision around whether or not to let something go, try the tips above.
We get the choice to live our lives on auto-pilot or to live intentionally, in line with our values.
Here’s to deciding well.
Julia Ubbenga is a freelance journalist whose teachings on minimalism, simplicity, and intentional living have reached thousands of people worldwide through her blog. Julia practices what she preaches in her Kansas City home with her husband, two extremely lively young daughters, and one-year-old son. Her 30-day course “Live Life Intentionally” will help you live with less stuff, less stress, and more space for what matters. You can also find her on Instagram.
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